LOVE vs LUST

from my frnd nelly -
osho's

LOOK LOVINGLY ON SOME OBJECT… LOVINGLY is the key.

Have you ever looked lovingly at any object? You may say yes because you do not know what it means to look lovingly at an object. You may have looked lustfully at an object – that is another thing. That is totally different, diametrically opposite. So first, the difference; try to feel the difference.

A beautiful face, a beautiful body – you look at it, and you feel that you are looking at it lovingly. But why are you looking at it? Do you want to get something out of it? Then it is lust, not love. Do you want to exploit it? Then it is lust, not love. Then really, you are thinking of how to use this body, how to possess it, how to make this body an instrument for your happiness.

Lust means how to use something for your happiness; love means your happiness is not at all concerned. Really, lust means how to get something out of it and love means how to give something. They are diametrically opposite.

If you see a beautiful face and you feel love toward the face, the immediate feeling in your consciousness will be how to do something to make this face happy, how to do something to make this man or this woman happy. The concern is not with yourself, the concern is with the other. In love the other is important; in lust you are important. In lust you are thinking how to make the other your instrument; in love you are thinking how to become an instrument yourself. In lust you are going to sacrifice the other; in love you are going to sacrifice yourself.

Love means giving; lust means getting. Love is a surrender; lust is an aggression.What you say is meaningless. Even in lust you talk in terms of love. Your language is not very meaningful, so do not be deceived. Look within, and then you will come to understand that you have not once in your life looked lovingly toward someone or some object.

The second distinction to be made: this sutra says, LOOK LOVINGLY ON SOME OBJECT. Really, even if you look lovingly at something material, insentient, the object will become a person. If you look lovingly at it, your love is the key to transform anything into a person. If you look lovingly at a tree, the tree becomes a person.

Just the other day I was talking with Vivek, a close disciple, and I told her that when we move to the new ashram we will name every tree, because every tree is a person. Have you ever heard of anyone naming a tree? No one names a tree because no one feels love for it. If the case were otherwise, a tree would become a person.

Then it is not just one in a crowd, it becomes unique. You name dogs and cats. When you name a dog and you call it Tiger or something else, the dog becomes a person. Then it is not just one dog amongst other dogs, it has a personality; you have created a person. Whenever you look lovingly at something, it becomes a person.

And the contrary is also true. Whenever you look with lustful eyes toward a person, the person becomes an object, a thing. That is why lustful eyes are repulsive – because no one likes to become a thing. When you look at your wife with lustful eyes – or at any other woman, or man, with lustful eyes – the other feels hurt. What are you doing really? You are changing a person, a living person, into a dead instrument.

You are thinking of how to ”use,” and the person is killed. That is why lustful eyes are repulsive, ugly. When you look at someone with love, the other is raised. He becomes unique. Suddenly he becomes a person. A person cannot be replaced; a thing can be replaced. A ‘thing’ means that which is replaceable; a ‘person’ means that which cannot be replaced: there is no possibility of replacing him or her.

A person is unique; a thing is not unique. Love makes anything unique. That is why without love you never feel like a person. Unless someone loves you deeply, you never feel that you have any uniqueness. You are just one in a crowd – just a number, a datum. You can be changed.

OSHO
HOPE YOU ALL LIKED THAT...
GURU

ANALYSIS OF OFF-WORK LAIBILITIES

17May , 2010 @DEHRADUN a beautiful Monday starting with a enthusiastic thought…looking to apply for a driving license…with a help of a neighboring friend miss shaifali…
Now shaifali is kind of lady always helpful atleast to me…from response sheets to a recent DL experiment..
But bahut jaldi gussa ho jaati hai..(say somthing about her pig cum dog-MONTY)Praise the lord she didn’t ate me up on the way..as her small hereditary eyes were dictating the story…finally time was decided on 16th evening after couple of UPS and DOWNS…my Morning msg-“where would u like to meet me 9.30astley hall or 9.45 RTO(one of the biggest hell I have ever seen)?” then comes a reply “mere sath chal lena astley hall se” makes me feel pretty comfortable as dehradun girls usually look beard boys with a tiresome look… time fixed at 9:45am astley hall.. left house at 9.10am with a speed of 5km/hr, I cant walk more than it…suddenly it reminds me for the photocopies of the documents..10shops of premnagar and a single answer by everyone
“LIGHT NI HAI” as this the motto on the lips aftr 9in the morning..finally fetched up a shop on the premnagar chowk an old ally..always on service..but the speed reminded me of the atal bihari vajpaye former PM of ind.
Lastly made up in 7mins as time value was notable…oh my god !!! it was 9.30 at premnagar!!!
WHAT THE HELL I WAS DOING??? Changed gears to the speed of 17km/hr to hang out on the nearest bus ..conductor with a chirpy smile welcomes! Hardly reached IMA a msg comes “where r u?” followed by 2 ignored calls..replied IMA
Shaifali-“hai bhagwan” (blv me the quote reminds me well of the small temple in front of my house under the big banyan tree built by mr bhatia :)”)
Himanshu-“yar photostate ki shop dhund rat ha bas late ho gya,I will be there in 15mins reached panditwari,I knw its annoying but…“
Shaifali-“tumhara dhyan kaha rehta hai,ye sab kaam kal karna tha”
Atlast I cross ballupur with handful of scolding kind msgs …here comes the kishanagar chowk I granted my seat to a lady..not exactly beautiful but fair around 30s…I was waiting for thanks call but she didn’t even thanked me..might be that s the biggest problem in india ..
At bindal my cell rings “ab kaha pohche”
Replying standing is a major crime as with the support of one hand u could fall over a dirty lady of town,and all u get is a slang! bang bang boom boom!!!!
“I HATE YOU” was the next sandesh -a stricter
while driver changed the song-
“DEKHA HAI PEHLI BAAR SAJAN KI ANKHO ME PYAAR..
”bet this is the good way to lowering the temperature of crowd in 40*c…
My last msg-“mai uske liye jindagi bhar intzar kar skta hu,aur tum mere liye 5min bhi nahi?”
Here comes the end- and junior gaur reaches astly hall,she sitting over horse oppo to mcd in a violet uppers and grey lowers.still I expected a smile but…THERE IS ALWAYS A BUT..her eyes told everything



THIS WAS ALL I COULD CLICK ON THE WAY LIKE AN ACTIVE REPORTER- INDIANISM against inflation(is thr any1 who could xplain them ki inflation depends upon cost of services/goods,production and interest rates -HELL)


 Finally she started her mini-horse and I sat behind all set for the latest newton’s rule…
HERE NOW SHAIFALI BECOMES THE 4TH GIRL TO CARRY ME ON HER TWO WHEELER” After ritu,shruti,and deepanshi…after a responsible driving of 5mins we reach out the HELL better called

“PARIWAHAN NIGAM”-RTO

Rchd -parked I thanked her –“U DROVE WELL:” usko smaj ni aya I ALL got “haaan+ an annoying face?”
At counter my tongue slips of “passport form dena” that makes the girl smile ALL WITHOUT A MAJOR REASON
She comes out and I asked what to do? Reply comes”ISKO BHARWANA HAI KISI SE”
Finally we found her OLD relative not much shocked to see us together fills the form in 10mins “THEN I FIND THE GUY DESERVES TO SIT ON THE THRONE WHAT A SUBERB TIME MANAGEMENT “ and all that for free!
“shisksharthi licence counter”
Now the dirt begins…with a cracking voice “SERVER KHARAB HAI”
With a hope that server becomes right in couple of mins I stood on the doorway…wo ander chai peeta raha..mai dhoop me barbaad hota raha…tuff to describe wat hapend but easy to define..
n this girl was on 10feets distance standing on the side for sms conversation behaving like an untouchable beggar to me…oh jesus the dog comes !some hope -as the girl wants to leave for her “pendrive principle”
“tum kar loge” by a sms..i replied can u come to my left. Shaifali- “Y”? she didn’t bothered ..
finally my delicate shoulder is hit by a hand covering long sun-gloves…i wanted to speak to her
and suddenly my chance comes at the counter with much expectations I look in my form on the dogs paw!his eyes grew dim n finally wat hapend ??
THE ASSHOLE THREW MY FORM OUT OF THE WINDOW “ most disheartening moment of the day..is pe voter id card lagao..how hard I made the moron to understand…I was not one those ki throw bribes.. bitterly disappointed GURU..again the girl (shaifali)smiles but for what???no reason no joke inspite of a tragedy!! And she is still proud to b an Indian!!!!
I can say how much pain I m deserving today..aftr the pariwahan udhyan experiment..
Finally had a pepsi and a burger at local café on rajpur road..as I didn’t sat with her back.. .that is considered as a EMBARRASSMENT IN INDIANISM”
Walked home along with a Tibetan rally thanking INDIA …
in hot sun reminds her statement to me ”DIN ME DHOOP HOTI HAI”
Just had a curry chawal…mum out of house nana ji not well at rishikesh ..hope all is well
May jesus gives the strength !
amen

GURU

"how to improve your financial planning client relationships"

You can improve your relationships with financial planning clients by encouraging them to communicate honestly with you from the very beginning...these things often came to mind but mai humesha se deep sochne se darta raha...i blv'd that financial planning ko sirf upar se karo no need of going so deep,u know if that happens client can dominate u any time...

This is the main lesson I took away from mr. Jacob’s presentation on "How to Say Anything to Anyone: Paving the Way to Powerful Working Relationships" to the annual conference of the Financial Planning Association of INDIA,new delhi


Ask for honesty
mr Jacob suggested that audience members achieve this by saying, "I want a great relationship with you. If I do anything that violates your expectations, frustrates you or causes you challenges, please tell me. I promise I will say thank you."

Assuming that your client says "yes" to your request, then you can add, "I hope I can do the same with you." This sets the stage for two-way communication. If it works, you'll never be surprised again by a client defection.

I asked Jacob what he'd recommend saying after "thank you" when a client gives negative feedback. Don't say anything other than "thank you" right away, she suggested, because you'll feel defensive. Go away and think things over. You can follow up later.

Follow up with questions
Don't stop with your initial agreement to be honest with each other. Follow up with questions that help you to understand your client better, said Jacobs.

Here are some of her suggested questions:
1. Who was the best service provider you ever worked with?
2. What made him/her the best service provider?
3. What are your pet peeves?
4. Do you prefer email or voicemail?
5. What do you wish I would start, stop and continue doing?

I can see how these questions would benefit me as a service provider and a client. It's time to rev up my courage and start asking more questions.

I believe Jacob's approach could benefit you in your professional and personal life.

" MAKE A DIFFERENCE"

My friend Ajay sent this to me this morning and it felt soooooo good that I wanted to share it with all :) Thanx Ajay !!!!!
One day Maths teacher asked her students to list the names of the other students in the room on two sheets of paper, leaving a space between each name.

Then she told them to think of the nicest thing they could say about each of their classmates and write it down.

It took the remainder of the class period to finish their assignment, and as the students left the room, each one handed in the papers.

That Saturday, the teacher wrote down the name of each student on a separate sheet of paper, and listed what everyone else had said about that individual.

On Monday she gave each student his or her list. Before long, the entire class was smiling. 'Really?' she heard whispered. 'I never knew that I meant anything to anyone!' and, 'I didn't know others liked me so much,' were most of the comments.

No one ever mentioned those papers in class again. She never knew if they discussed them after class or with their parents, but it didn't matter. The exercise had accomplished its purpose. The students were happy with themselves and one another. That group of students moved on.

Several years later, one of the students was killed in Kargil' war and his teacher attended the funeral of that special student. She had never attended Funeral of a serviceman before. He looked so handsome, so mature.

The place was packed with his friends. One by one those who loved him took a last walk. The teacher was the last one to bless .

As she stood there, one of the soldiers who acted as pallbearer came up to her. 'Were you Sanjay's math teacher?' he asked. She nodded: 'yes.' Then he said: 'Sanjay talked about you a lot..'

After the funeral, most of Sanjay's former classmates were there. Sanjay's mother and father were there, obviously waiting to speak with his teacher.

'We want to show you something,' his father said, taking a wallet out of his pocket 'They found this on Sanjay when he was killed. We thought you might recognize it.'

Opening the billfold, he carefully removed two worn pieces of notebook paper that had obviously been taped, folded and refolded many times. The teacher knew without looking that the papers were the ones on which she had listed all the good things each of Sanjay's classmates had said about him.
Thank you so much for doing that,' Sanjay's mother said. 'As you can see, Sanjay treasured it.'

All of Sanjay's former classmates started to gather around. Arjun smiled rather sheepishly and said, 'I still have my list. It's in the top drawer of my desk at home.'

Prithwiraj's wife said, ' Prithwiraj asked me to put his in our wedding album.'
'I have mine too,' Rashmi said. 'It's in my diary'

Then Deepali, another classmate, reached into her pocketbook, took out her wallet and showed her worn and frazzled list to the group. 'I carry this with me at all times,' Deepali said and without batting an eyelash, she continued: 'I think we all saved our lists'

That's when the teacher finally sat down and cried. She cried for Sanjay and for all his friends who would never see him again.

The density of people in society is so thick that we forget that life will end one day. And we don't know when that one day will be.

So please, tell the people you love and care for, that they are special and important. Tell them, before it is too late....


guruism@aol.in

""""INDIANISM"""

read it till the end then send me the feedback,

the two Ambani brothers can buy 100 percent of every company listed on the Karachi Stock Exchange (KSE) and would still be left with $30 billion to spare. The four richest Indians can buy up all goods and services produced over a year by 169 million Pakistanis and still be left with $60 billion to spare. The four richest Indians are now richer than the forty richest Chinese. [current rating shows the elder brother Mukesh’s total wealth is 22 billion US dollars]
In November, Bombay Stock Exchange's benchmark Sensex flirted with 20,000 points. As a consequence, Mukesh Ambani's Reliance Industries became a $100 bill ion company (the entire KSE is capitalized at $65 billion)
In 2004, India became the 3rd most attractive foreign direct investment destination. Pakistan wasn't even in the top 25 countries.
In 2004, the United Nations, the representative body of 192 sovereign member states, had requested the Election Commission of India to assist the UN in the holding elections in Al Jumhuriyah al Iraqiyah and Dowlat-e Eslami-ye Afghanestan. Why the Election Commission of India and not the Election Commission of Pakistan? After all, Islamabad is closer to Kabul than is Delhi.
Imagine, 12 percent of all American scientists are of Indian origin; 38 percent of doctors in America are Indian; 36 percent of NASA scientists are Indians; 34 percent of Microsoft employees are Indians; and 28 percent of IBM employees are Indians.


For the record: Sabeer Bhatia created and founded Hotmail. Sun Microsystems was founded by Vinod Khosla. The Intel Pentium processor, that runs 90 percent of all computers, was fathered by Vinod Dham.

Rajiv Gupta co-invented Hewlett Packard's E-speak project. Four out often Silicon Valley start-ups are run by Indians. Bollywood produces 800 movies per year and six Indian ladies have won Miss Universe/Miss World titles over the past 10 years.

For the record: Azim Premji, the richest Muslim entrepreneur on the face of the planet, was born in Bombay and now lives in Bangalore.India now has more than three dozen billionaires; Pakistan has none (not a single dollar billionaire).
The other amazing aspect is the rapid pace at which India is creating wealth. In 2002, Dhirubhai Ambani, Mukesh and Anil Ambani's father, left his two sons a fortune worth $2.8 billion. In 2007, their combined wealth stood at $94 billion. On 29 October 2007, as a result of the stock market rally and the appreciation of the Indian rupee, Mukesh became the richest person in the world, with net worth climbing to US$63.2 billion (Bill Gates, the richest American, stands at around $56 billion). Indians and Pakistanis have the same Y-chromosome haplogroup. We have the same genetic sequence and the same genetic marker (namely: M124).

We have the same DNA molecule, the same DNA sequence. Our culture, our traditions and our cuisine are all the same. We watch the same movies and sing the same songs. What is it that Indians have and we don't?

INDIANS ELECT THEIR LEADERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And also to mention: They think Construction of own nation, unlike other nations who are just concerned with destruction of others...
-GURU-south asia post

our govt. creates more terrorism on humanity rather "Maoists"

In Chattisgarh, more crpf jawans get killed by mosquito bites than by Maoists! Yes, that’s the ironic piece of research my friends ..
Thanks to the Maoist attack recently, which left 75 dead, the government suddenly is feeling concerned about the jawans’ lives! However, before this incident, in the last two years over a hundred of them had died of malaria, which was more than the numbers killed on duty. But previously, of course, the government was not concerned about the lives of jawans because malarial deaths obviously don’t happen in a dramatic newsworthy manner.

Is it not ironic that our paramilitary forces die more of curable diseases than of bullets? Well, that’s the crux of India's problems. That more CRPF jawans are today scared to die of malaria than of Maoist bullets tells just one side of the story. The other side of the story is the story of India's reality today. The story of how we neglect about 60 percent of our population and condemn them to die of hunger, curable diseases and mosquito bites. That’s roughly about 650 million Indians who live below the internationally accepted standard of poverty line of 1.25 dollars per day. While India and Indian media celebrate the rise of its billionaires in the Forbes lists, the poor die penniless out of hunger – unknown and unheard.

And unlike the perception that the government wants to create of Maoists as terrorists, the truth is that Maoists are from these very poor families who are marginalised and left to die of hunger. Worldwide, when leaders have kept such huge sections of masses marginalized, there have been revolutions. You ignore human beings and condemn them to die, they will one day believe that picking up arms is a better option than to die without a fight. History is full of heroes who have killed. Those who kill for a cause are celebrated and those who kill without a cause are called murderers. And the cause is also determined by history. Not by today’s media and their judgment.

While the government might be hell-bent on calling the Maoists murderers, the fact is that our governments over the years have been full of murderers. Not just in terms of the cases against most of our politicians but in terms of the way they murder their people by depriving them of food, health and employment – the three basic things a government was supposed to be judged by. Our governments kill about 40% of our masses before they reach the age of 45. These people would have gone on to live till 75 had they got access to food and health. Our governments, over the years, have killed millions through their unpatriotic acts of selfish politics – that of enriching themselves and a handful of business houses while allowing massive poverty to exist all around. And that is why in the eyes of many – from Medha Patkar to Maheshwata Devi – Maoists are not terrorists or murderers but those poor people who have taken to arms and kill for a cause. They want food. They want masses to rise out of rampant poverty. They want health and freedom from destitution and freedom from an assured death sentence that the government has given them by not providing them the right to live and a life of dignity. Men thrown to die will always try to fight back. Such men have the support of the masses where they fight.

If the government wants to really end the Maoist problem, it needs to look beyond. It needs to begin by finding its heart first... a heart that beats for the poorest. And then do real good work for the poorest of the poor. Poor have no reason to pick up arms. They need food. They need employment. They need health, education and dignity. Give them these and they would not take to arms. Condemn them to die young, hungry and penniless, and they will take to Maoism. The slogan mongering and name calling utilized by the government against the Maoists would not absolve the government of its terrorism on humanity. Real work for the poor in the Naxal infested belts will save the government of all the stress of how to deal with internal security. Otherwise, it would not just be every Maoist killed who would give birth to more such Maoists, but even the many children of the jawans dying of mosquito bites who could one day take to spraying bullets on the malaria-spreading ruling parasites of this country.., And history, I repeat, might not call them terrorists...

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A newly productive India??

In the mid-1990s, Japan funded and provided technology for a new bridge across the Yamuna in Delhi. At that time even minor repairs on the old Yamuna bridges would carry on for decades (seriously). Therefore it came as a shock to us Delhi-wallahs when we saw this bridge being built in a matter of months, sometimes even at night under spotlights, with every worker wearing a bright yellow hardhat. It was the talk of the town. Somehow the pace of road/bridge/flyover/metro construction in Delhi was never the same again. Today, our city's public works proceed almost at the pace at which they do elsewhere in the world.

A few years later, in the early 2000s, I noticed the local FM radio stations taking up specific local issues and demanding accountability from the government. For example, they would talk about a big pothole on such and such road and then report back a few days later that it had been filled. (I immediately invested in the Indian stockmarket, with good results!) That activism on radio appears to have subsided but it left its mark. Delhi's roads are by and large of better quality than, say, Boston's.

Yesterday I had another experience that appears significant. I had to get my Delhi driving license renewed and went to the Regional Transport Office at Surajmal Vihar. Though the place was moderately crowded, the experience was smoother than that at most private sector institutions.

The man at the Enquiry counter directed me to Counter #4 ("Renewals"). I stood in the queue and got to the counter in a few minutes. The guy looked at my papers, smiled and said, "We don't need so many documents for residence proof, just one will do. Just get it verified from Counter #11."

The Counter #11 guy spent just about 30 seconds on my document and signed the copy. He directed me back to Counter #4.

The #4 guy now entered my data into the computer. There were two computer screens, one facing him and one facing me. He asked me to verify the details when he was done. Then he stamped my paperwork, asked me to sign and said, "Pay the fees". Used to Indian government offices, I thought the cashier would be sitting somewhere far away behind a wire grill, acting like some demi-god. I was pleasantly surprised to find instead that the cashier was the Counter #3, which was essentially three feet to the left of where I stood and looked identical to every other counter.

A few minutes in the queue later, I was in front of the Counter #3 guy. He glanced at my documents; "Rs 300".

While I counted out the money, he pulled up my case on the computer and at once my receipt began to print out in front of the guy next to him. He asked me to step in front of this other guy, who motioned me to sit on a stool I had not noticed till then, clicked a photograph via webcam, asked me to step up and sign an electronic pad and then offer my index finger for a fingerprint. All in a minute.

And then it was done. "The license will be couriered to you." I could not believe it - the entire process had taken just ten or fifteen minutes and had been pleasant. Every RTO employee was fully occupied and productive. In the US it typically takes much longer and even the productivity appears to be lower.

This automation of processes in government departments yields fewer opportunities for bribery. A friend noted yesterday that some folks who work there try to squeeze out some money by being slow to return the change when you give them a currency note and hoping that you will just walk away. Bad, true, but a big improvement!

Kudos to the Delhi transport minister for running such a smooth operation. If such cleansing spreads outwards from Delhi and the metros, it will be a big reason to be bullish on India...
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AN INDIA WE HAVE TO ADRESS....

what is the best brand of india??
guess????
colgate ...hahahha its on papers..just read till the end u wil come to know!

I realize that I have already used two consecutive installments of this blog on "A midsummer nightmare" and I wondered if I should risk a third on a similar theme. This is, after all, a blog on a business school website.

But as things turned out, I came across an intense essay by a young friend who is of Indian origin but was born in the US and has lived there all her life. Her name is Meesha and she is a second year science undergrad. She visited India when she was 16, and wrote this essay when she was 19 for an English class. I was compelled by its elegant sadness to put it up here.

It talks of things about India that we all know but have to gloss over in order to stay sane. And it describes them through the innocent eyes of the very young who have never lived here.

It's worth reading, even as I look out of my Gurgaon window and see an entire horizon of skyscrapers twinkling with lights.

So here goes - an essay on a trip to the Taj Mahal.

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What constitutes the title “wonder of the world?” Is it a wall constructed perfectly to keep the enemy out, is it an ancient city on a mountain, is it a colossal theater, or is it a beautifully designed tomb for someone's long lost love? Furthermore, once titled, should everything surrounding the “wonder” be shrouded in a mask of majesty; can nothing other than the facade of it's name be perceived? Well, if that was the intent, I am witness to failure.

The Taj Mahal itself is the most impressive structure I have ever witnessed. As I crossed the threshold from the blindness of being behind the surrounding walls to a panoramic view of the Taj Mahal, the sheer size of the building and it's surroundings caught the breath short in my chest (opulence seems to have been one of Mumtaz's specialties). The reflection pool laid in front of the Taj is analogous to a red carpet; setting one up for the extravagance to come. While walking up the the steps, the sun reflecting off the marble and into my retinas provided the next transition of scenery: the inside. The tomb is embellished from top to bottom causing one's eye to dart frantically trying to absorb all of the information. Essentially, the ceiling is the inside of a giant onion dome that begs the question of how such a large structure remains suspended. After surveying the inside in it's entirety I left with a memory that will be forever have engraved in my mind.

With all this said, one may ask where the failure component occurred. The reason I suggest that I felt disappointed is not because of the experience of seeing the Taj Mahal itself, but rather the journey to get to it. When I think back on my experience, rather than feeling fond, I am immediately flooded with despair. The things that I witnessed on a five hour car ride changed my life forever.

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As I get into the car I hear my mother outside talking to her brother. She mutters in Hindi, “I don't know if I can handle this.” He reassures her and she gets into the vehicle. We start the journey in our air conditioned SUV that sticks out like a sore thumb on the winding dirt roads. As per usual we witness the occasional beggar or child selling corn on the side of the road. As the heat of the noon starts beating down on our metal case the air condition struggles to maintain equilibrium. We crack open a can of coke and drink it greedily. As the hours pass the scenery changes from the tranquil India I know to a very different world. I see nothing but shacks. Tiny “home” contraptions made of old car parts and scrap metal. People line the roads by the hundreds, so much so that we are not driving any longer, but rather, crawling.

The people are a whole new world too. Due to the lack of shelter their skin appears to be charred by the sun like burgers left on a grill too long. Their corneas and teeth are the same shade of unhealthy yellow. Their hair is matted to their head like a dog that hasn't been brushed in years. Actually, the longer I look at them the more they remind me of stray animals rather than people. The things they do start to strike me as beast-like. A naked man crudely blows his nose into his hand. A mother carries her child on her back while looking through a garbage heap with her hands. The air is thick with melancholy.

Then I see the most graphic image I have ever witnessed in my life. It is burned into my memory; vivid and brutally honest. When I close my eyes and think about this car ride I see a child wearing only a dirty loin cloth squatting on the roadside defecating exactly like my dog does in the back yard. I can see the discomfort of his severe diarrhea in his eyes. I can see him being reduced to less than a beast. He has been stripped of all humanity, he has lost what it means to be a homosapien; he is merely a mass. This is the brush that colored my world with an entirely different palate than I had ever imagined. Suddenly a stark reality set in that the world around me sucks.

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After this point the rest of the trip was cast in shadows. The trip that I had been looking forward to with a naïve sense of optimism, was now tainted with truth. Ever since this fated moment, whenever I see a homeless person, or someone being petty and materialistic, the image of that boy pops into my head and drapes me in a sheet of sorrow.

The reason that this trip had such a profound effect on me is largely because of the context I come from. I come from the world of middle-class America. Where I have privileges that only a fraction of the world has the luxury of enjoying. One such privilege is watching the trials of the world on the silver screen in the safety of an overly air-conditioned movie theater. I did just that when I saw the movie Slumdog Millionaire. I felt the same way the day I watched that movie that I did at the moment I witnessed that boy. I could not speak afterwards, and the rest of the day was cast in those same shadows.

I feel that I will revisit that boy many times in my life. Although, it hurts me, I am glad that I have him. He keeps me grounded. He reminds me of how incredibly blessed I am. He also drives me to help; to help him and everyone around him. Finally, I learned from him. I learned that India is a beautiful country rich with culture, but it is also a broken spirit. There are far too many little boys out there who don't know what it feels like to be comfortable and well. When I think of the Taj Mahal I taste a bittersweetness in my mouth. The structure itself is beautiful, but the journey to get to it is morbid. I find this to be a metaphor for all of India; the potential is there, but you need to go through a lot of hardships to reach perfection.

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guruism@aol.in

"""" Structuring work intelligently...!!!!!!"""

today after a long time i got the chance and a good post to update the blo..guys thanks for ur suport..and feedbacks all the time..hope u like this one!

If I were to list the top three teachable skills that are most important in the Indian workplace, being able to structure work intelligently would figure on that list.

What do I mean by structuring work? I mean being able to break down a job intelligently into its sub-tasks, so that when you think you are done, you are really done! And you have done well!

Let me give an example. Let us say my boss asked me to find a good location for a new office that is being planned. I could take up this job in several ways.

THE BAD WAYS

1. The "Stunned-into-silence" way: I go away and am not heard from again, almost. Each time the boss asks me the status, I make some noises to the effect that I am working on it. I want to finish it all before I show her anything but I don't really know what to do! Then as more time passes, I start to feel I'll have to show her even more stuff. Now I get terribly uncomfortable. Finally when she pings me yet again, I make some more noises and show her some tidbits of work. She gets fed up, understands that the job is too much for me, and gives it to someone else.

2. The "Please-wipe-my-nose-for-me" way: I come back two days later and ask my boss, "Should I look up some real estate brokers?" When she says yes because she is busy and can't pay full attention to my question, I go away, only to come back a few days later. "Ma'am, I have got the phone numbers of three real estate brokers. Should I try to get some more?" "Yes!" she exclaims, deep in some work. Then I come back again a few days later and say, "Ma'am, I now have the contacts of six brokers. What should I do next?" And so on. It takes ten times as long as it needed to and the boss starts to feel that she might have just as well done it all herself. Also because she is answering many stupid one-off questions when she's not paying full attention, the process is bad and the task gets done badly.

3. The "First-idea-that-comes-to-mind" way: I come back in an hour and say, "Ma'am, there is an office available at xyz address, should we book it? The color of the walls is very good!"

Do these examples look too bad to be true? We see such examples every single week!


THE GOOD WAY

Some thinking and planning goes a long way. Think of it as a project.

What are the criteria for a good decision, i.e. what are we trying to achieve? These could be hard constraints - e.g. the office must be at least 10,000 square feet - or these could be objectives - e.g. distance from public transport. Write the criteria down! When you think you are done, brainstorm for some more ideas. One could also assign weightages for these criteria such as critical, important, good to have, etc. Weightages can of course alse be numerical.

Next, what are the alternatives? I can divide the town into various zones and look at the alternatives at that level. And I can later list all the alternatives under each zone.

As I proceed, I need to make sure I am tapping all the sources of information. This is not just information regarding the alternatives (e.g. real estate brokers, etc.) but also regarding the criteria (e.g. HR can tell me how many people live in each zone, etc.) If I forget to tap a source of information, the lapse will probably come back to bite me.

Only when I have set this entire framework in place should I proceed to evaluate each of my alternatives against my criteria. I'd ideally do it in a spreadsheet.

The evaluation will lead me to the decision, or at least take me close enough. Once the choices have been narrowed down, the final decision is often a little subjective and the boss might want to make it.*

Anyway, if I structure my thinking and my work in this way, my boss will probably be quite impressed with my thoroughness and abilities. I'll go far in the company.

It's easy, right? Yes! But you'll be surprised how few people actually act this way.

So watch out for the "Stunned-into-silence", "Please-wipe-my-nose-for-me" and "First-idea-that-comes-to-mind" modes of project failure. Practise structuring your work intelligently, so that when the time comes and you are given the responsibility of a big project, you'll do a good job....

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